An effective profile is no accident. If you are a good ad man or woman, you probably don’t need to read it. Yes, it is an ad, Virginia. A very precious and personal one at that. The most important is being able to implant a favorable and strong impression of you on the singles that happen to read your profile. But it has to be the kind of ad, which will also attract the right kind of dates, hopefully screening out those undesirables, and there are plenty of those you don’t want to hear from!

General Impression

It won’t make a lot of difference what your profile says about your hair color or your career. The key is imprinting a burning and urgent impression on the prospective dates to meet you. The general impression of you is built mainly on two things: your PHOTOGRAPH and ESSAYS! All others are fringe info and necessary noise. All you have to do is think how you screen others’ profile. It’s a safe assumption that other singles will use a similar process to screen the profiles before narrowing down.

Yes, you will use age range, distance, height, possibly religion, education, etc. in the search criteria. But you can’t do anything about it. You have to tell the truth. No need to dress up with a few twists of facts, which you will eventually have to confess not to be true. There will be plenty of dream dates who will love you just as you are. For factual items, just tell the truth. For now, let’s concentrate on pics and essays.

Your picture is your pitchman!

In most online dating sites, half the profiles are missing the photos. Even if you only want to look for someone, not expecting someone to find you, it’s not a good practice not to post photos. If you contact someone, whom you thought were your dream date, she will have to agree before anything happens. Most likely if she posted her pics, she won’t agree to meet you unless she could see your pictures too. It’s not that she want to know you are handsome. It’s the comfort of having seen you with her own eyes. In the relative cold world of cyberspace, a photograph of a man or woman brings the warms of human touch. Without a photo, you may as well forget about getting your dream dates online.

Pictures act like a pitchman. It draws other singles to look at your profile. You don’t have to be handsome or beautiful. You can’t do a thing about how you look any way. But your pictures can be fabulous, regardless how you look. A clear, well-composed, good quality photo will make anyone look good. What makes you sexy and desirable is the self confidence and the happy face attached to you in the picture. If you are self-conscious on your looks or a bit over-weight, don’t worry. There will be thousands of dream dates who will love you just the way you are, fat or thin. Beauty is indeed in the eyes of beholder. Consider photo an essential part of your profile, and you CAN post a fabulous photo. See my companion article, Fabulous Pictures in Your Dating Profile

Headline

After photo, the next thing that will draw your potential dates to your profile is your headline. Make it catchy and personal. Make it upbeat and optimistic. Let it stand out. It should not only be catchy and cleaver, it should also say something about you. For a business, it’s like a corporate slogan or a tagline under the logo. “Fun loving physician,” though not very imaginative, is a lot better than “Looking for my beautiful angel,” because the doc is telling something about himself, while the angel-seeker only tells what he wants. Many will classify the angel-seeker as egotistic, only talking about his needs, and a greedy one at that as he only wants “beautiful” women. It pays to scan through various headlines in several online dating sites with critical view to get an idea. Make sure you enter the headline. No headline is a missed opportunity. Here are some examples taken from online dating sites.

Examples of good headlines:

• Classy outdoorsy lady seeks an energetic gentleman! --- Tells what her priority is and what she wants in an upbeat manner.


• Classic Music Lover seeking to share good life. --- same


• Clean living, with a positive attitude. --- Upbeat and wholesome


• Spontaneous, fun, always on the move. --- You can tell he is a go-getter.


• hello asian lady --- Although it does not say anything about himself, it will get Asian ladies’ attention as he speaks directly to them.


• My harley is lonely without a passenger. --- He will get his passenger, as he shouts at Harley-loving women.

Examples of poor headlines:

• Looking for love. --- Who isn’t? Unimaginative. Sounds needy.


• Humor me, please. --- OK, but what are you going to do for me?


• I would like to hear from you. --- Oh, really?


• Looking for a man who loves me like no other. --- Give me a reason.


• Someone to enjoy life with --- Not very imaginative, no energy.


• How about some fun? --- Gives wrong message, unless that’s what she really means.


• Real man looking for real woman! --- Not meaningful.

The essay is what brings your personality out in an online dating profile.
Click here for Part II (Essay)